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14 July 2012 @ 11:42 am
Honesty.  
I'm not breaking my promise to be more open and honest. Here is what has happened since I last posted:

I keep worrying that I'm neglecting people so much that I push myself. I don't want to completely cut myself off from the world and never do anything, but I've been in ridiculous amounts of pain over the past few weeks. I'm getting worse and worse as they days go, in more and more pain, having to take pain killers every day. My hands shake, my body feels stiff as a board. This is why I haven't been online or making much of an effort to text/call/chat. I apologize for that, but I also know you all understand. 

Everything hurts terribly. It makes me sick to my stomach and makes me throw up and sweat and shake. I'm still getting the lupron injections, and yet I've gotten my period this month. My body is so resistant to medicine that I have to keep changing what I take to get results. This is another reason why things get so expensive and why I can't afford so many medicines that I need.

Despite that, I keep getting really sweet texts from my friends telling me they love me. I got a package from Pat and her boyfriend, Brandon, with little Iron Man and Captain America dolls. That made my whole morning. 

I had a long talk with my father about what's going on with me. His RA is so advanced that he's had surgeries, and he's worried that mine is going down the road of his, considering my left hand is a bit warped like his (the doc said even without the blood test she knew I had RA, when she felt the knuckles in my hands). My thumb, as I've mentioned before, is deformed, and now my little pointer finger is going the same route. I can no longer straighten it.

I've tried home remedies and natural remedies that friends have urged me to try. So far, nada. I'll keep trying though, so any suggestions you have, if you know of any, do let me know.

Thank you all for your continued support. You mean the world to me, and even though I'm not around as often as I used to be, I still love you very much and will always be here for you.

<3
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Morgan Stuart: Sherlock/3 in Colormorganstuart on July 14th, 2012 11:54 pm (UTC)
Love you, too, m'dear. You're in my thoughts and prayers! *hugs*
Jennytunes84 on July 15th, 2012 04:24 am (UTC)
Thank you, honey, so much.

I'm living in your neck of the woods for a while, so we should plan a date. I owe you your DVDs. <3
Morgan Stuartmorganstuart on July 16th, 2012 11:00 pm (UTC)
*hugs you more*

Oh, I'd love to get together with you. I'm staying pretty close to home for the immediate future (our girl Virginia begins chemotherapy this week, and I'm not sure how much care she'll require hour to hour), but let me get back to you ASAP - or if you find yourself in the Hickory area, please give me a shout!

*hugs you*
Jennytunes84 on July 27th, 2012 06:23 pm (UTC)
I'm always in the Hickory area now. Let me know a good time for you :)
primrose_1primrose_1 on July 16th, 2012 03:50 am (UTC)
Hooboy. Home remedies? I play around with things here and there, but I'm no expert. I have a friend who's a licensed herbalist and I can ask her. She did help my daughter when she was having severe menstrual cramps. She had us using calcium- plant based calcium drops, not calcium from shells or milk. It worked fabulously well. I have NO idea if it's what you need, because I only barely know a little bit about the health issues you're struggling with, but that is something that worked for my daughter's issues.

My advice to you is to take care of your spirit as you struggle with the physical. Pray. Study the scriptures. Find ways to offer service to others with the limitations you have. Recognize that you are loved and treasured and are of infinite worth. Keep the faith and hang on, Lady!
Jennytunes84 on July 27th, 2012 06:23 pm (UTC)
*massive hugs*
Lady Mia Sedai: Disney - nemo baskmiasedai on July 16th, 2012 10:27 pm (UTC)
I love YOU. Did you ever get my little package in the mail? <3
Jennytunes84 on July 27th, 2012 06:24 pm (UTC)
Love you.